The past month has been difficult for the Weber family. We have missed having daddy around. We have missed our family routines and schedules. We have missed prayer time together, family meals, and even movie nights all together! But on top of all that, it has been stressful in packing and preparing a new journey and life together through separation. It has been difficult with unexpected turns in the path that we are travelling to prepare the way for our move to Pennsylvania. But this last week has been one of the toughest of tough.
We got the phone call Sunday night that the contract on our house fell through and we had bigger issues with (the buyer's) lender...lingo that you do not want me to get into on here. Let's just say I have educated myself on the VA Lender Handbook this past week and maybe one day will use this knowledge...hmmm never mind, probably not! On Sunday night, I was calm, cool, and collected and felt a peace that this would be ok because God has something different in store and He is taking care of us and every detail.
Monday morning came and I felt the same peace and assurance however there was also that bit of frustration and anger of why things once again seemed bumpy in this process. I pulled the kids aside and talked to them that our home was no longer "almost sold." I shared with them that we were starting the process all over again and ensured Zachary that he would not be cleaning toilets for any more showings because we were still leaving with daddy next week as planned. (Whew, he was relieved!!) They looked at me confused but yet with complete trust. Katelyn asked, "why the lady purchasing our home was being mean?" and I had to explain that she was not and it was a bank issue. And then the teachable moment struck with Zachary's confused and honest question of "well then if she is not being mean, why is God being mean? Why isn't he making this easy? Doesn't He want us in Pennsylvania?"
Wow! I was taken back by his words. Just as my 5 year old son questioned, I too have been guilty of wondering why does it feel as if those unanswered prayers or moments where complete faith is required sometimes feels as if He is abandoning those who love Him?
And then God used my 5 year old's question to allow us to have the teachable moment that following Jesus is not always easy. It does not always mean things will be easy for us or that He will give us everything that we think is best for us. He uses bumpy paths to help strengthen our faith and grow more dependent on Him. We talked about how God sometimes uses things like this to see where our trust lies...do we believe and act that He is in control of our lives or do we just say it?
So many say, and I wish I could believe, that "God doesn't give you more than you can handle" but the Bible doesn't say that. It tells us we won't be tempted beyond which we can bear. (1 Corinthians 10:13) I think God does give us way more than we can handle and it just causes us to have to depend on Him more. When we turn to Him and say "I can't do this anymore!," He is saying "You're right, you can't! But I can!"
I'm not sure why He chose to not sell our house right now or even make it more difficult for a little while longer, through some of the circumstances with this last contract, but I do know that He will use even this for His grace to reach more people and for Him to receive more glory.
"All of this is for your benefit. And as God’s grace reaches more and more people, there will be great thanksgiving, and God will receive more and more glory." 2 Corinthians 4:15
And because every week is better with giggles and smiles...